Simcha/Ayin Tova

Kislev/5781

Just a Little Background

CHOOSE HAPPY

There is no such thing as a bad day. There is such a thing as a day that had hard in it. If you had a hard day, think about the good that happened. Zeh hayom asah HASHEM nagila vinismicha bo. Hashem created the day, it must be good. Hashem, the source of all goodness only possesses good. And since everything is possessed by him, aka EVERYTHING BELONGS TO HIM, it can only BE good. We just have to open our eyes in order to be a keili to realize that good that was there all this time. YOU have to be the one to turn that light on. The light exists in the lightbulb. We have to just FLIP THAT SWITCH in order to see the light!! Hatov ki lo chalu rachamecha. Hashem’s bracha never ends.

Raise Your Bar

Practical Tips on How to Improve in Simcha

In the morning, right after you wake up, say modeh ani, then just smile for ten seconds. It really works! This really makes you happier so you have a better day! Scientifically, when you smile, it sends hormones to your brain and it tricks your brain into thinking you are happy.

Think something nice about someone who you usually think negative thoughts about. (Teacher, student, classmate, mailman...). Try to think of something nice about them. This will make you into the kind of person that sees the good in others.

Say lashon tov about someone to someone else. (Try saying something nice about your sibling/child to your parent/husband.) Do this especially in your family because we tend to take them for granted

For the first 5 minutes after walking through the door (specifically when you get home from being out), try to radiate sunshine. Just be bright, even if there is so much to complain about, the weather, your day, just try to hold it in for 5 minutes. It will set the tone and you will be much calmer. You might not even feel the need to complain at ALL after that! Pesach Chatas Roveitz, the Satan waits by the door, whenever you walk through the door, be aware that there is an extra yetzer hora, so we are trying to stave him off.

When you are doing something anyways, do it with a smile. Your mother asks you to wash the dishes, smile while you do it because you get so much schar if your serving Hashem with Simcha!

Try to get into the habit of saying "B'SIMCHA!" when someone asks you a favor. Many times we say "sure", or "no problem". "no problem" is actually a double negative, "no", and "problem". When you say "bsimcha" it makes the person feel much better.

Give compliments!! Words are free! After you give a compliment, they feel good, you feel good, and you bother walk away happy! It is so kedai!! Someone told me that someone told HER something that changed her life.Her Rav told this to her mother in front of her: "your daughter will go far in life". The Rav said this when she was 9 years old. Now she is 19 and she is still getting chizzuk from these 7 words. She always thinks about it. It gives her boosts to keep growing because she wants to fulfill it. BE THAT PERSON THAT BECAUSE OF YOU, PEOPLE WILL COME TO HAVE CHIZZUK LONG AFTER YOU FINISHED SAYING WHAT YOU SAID. Everyone is welcome to send me something that someone told you that changed your life. I am compiling a list of the best compliments to give. I will IyH send it out.

Thank Hashem!! Even if something is hard and nothing is going your way, thank Him for the ability to withstand. For inner strength. See the good! CHOOSE UP!

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Simcha/Ayin Tova

We hear all the time about the importance of positivity, of optimism, of having a good posivitive outlook, of changing our perspective to see things for the good. But now we are going to make it practical.

The chofetz chaim talks about the middah of narganus, of negativity. He writes that that is at the source of sinas chinum, of baseless hatred and of lashon hora. He talks of dan lkaf chov, not giving people the benefit of the doubt. When we are negative and see the negativity and look for the negativity in everyone and everything that happens. But the truth is, it goes beyond that. The difference between being a negative person and a positive person can have even more ramifications.

Dr. Victor Frankel, a famous psychologist went through the horrors of the concentration camps during the holocaust. He wrote a book called “Man’s Search for Meaning”. He discusses a concept called logotherapy, which chazal really taught us thousands of years ago. He said that it became the point of his very survival. In the camps, the Nazis took away everything, he had nothing, no food, no clothes, no dignity, nothing. But he came to realize that there is one thing the Nazis cannot touch. That they can never take away from him no matter what they do. His thoughts and his mind. He said that when he was in the camps going through the worst things you can imagine, he would picture himself through his vivid imagination, sitting behind a desk and counseling, doing what he loved most after the war. He had no idea when it would happen, where or when, or HOW it would be, but that is what he did. And he said that that is what got him through the war. He said that those people who became despondent and couldn’t picture themselves after the war, they are the ones who didn’t make it.

This concept of our thoughts playing such a major role became a branch of psychology called logotherapy. That in our thoughts we can be anywhere and accomplish anything, that can give us the chizzuk to keep on going.

And that concept of being a positive person, of always thinking positively, is not just a matter of giving us more happiness (which it does) and give us more fulfillment of life. But in some situations it can literally be a matter of life and death.

Laughter heals and is literally the best medicine.

Positive thinking can literally change your life. Your view on the situation shapes your reality.

Don’t sink into the natural pit of narganus, instead choose the light.

Simcha/Ayin Tova: Programs